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Author Topic: Joke of the Day  (Read 303977 times)

Crystaliz

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #570 on: April 08, 2015, 02:08:16 PM »
Oh that's funny...would it work

MALACHI

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #571 on: April 12, 2015, 10:42:09 AM »
A man and a woman are seated next to each other on a flight.
They start eyeing each other, and both realize they want to do the same thing.
He slips a condom out of his pocket, and she looks delighted.
Rear toilet? He suggests.
Five minutes, she agrees and goes off.
He waits five minutes, then goes and slips in there with her. “Right, get that condom on” she says.
Soon, they are both sighing with pleasure.
But a sharp eyed stewardess has noticed them, and realized what they are up to.
So, she humiliates them by making an announcement over the PA system. "To the lady and gentleman in the rear toilet, we know what you are doing, and it is expressly forbidden by airline regulations.
Now, please put those cigarettes out and take the condom off the smoke detector."

And what were you thinking?  ::) :) ;D

Crystaliz

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #572 on: April 12, 2015, 02:56:06 PM »
Haha   have to tell by brother pilot that one

Ghost

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #573 on: April 23, 2015, 12:26:04 PM »

MakkyBrown

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #574 on: May 19, 2015, 10:04:31 AM »
A farmer asks his border collie to count his sheep.

The dog runs into the field and after a short while returns to the farmer. The farmer says, "How many?"

The collie says, "Forty."

"How can there be 40? I only bought 38!"

"I rounded them up."

Jamo

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #575 on: May 19, 2015, 06:30:40 PM »
moan   ;)
Baaa humbug, not enough fossicking time!

Jamo

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #576 on: May 30, 2015, 07:58:35 AM »
perhaps some of you can relate o this ...

A woman on the phone to her friend;

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club and start exercising….

I decided to take and aerobics class for seniors.

I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour.

But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.
Baaa humbug, not enough fossicking time!

Crystaliz

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #577 on: May 30, 2015, 08:25:50 AM »
That's funny...I can understand....and I am picturing you, Jamo in leotards and it's even funnier.

Jamo

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #578 on: May 30, 2015, 12:02:57 PM »
That's funny...I can understand....and I am picturing you, Jamo in leotards and it's even funnier.
thanks ????
Baaa humbug, not enough fossicking time!

MALACHI

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #579 on: May 30, 2015, 09:58:23 PM »
I sometime feel I'm getting an aerobic workout when getting into my waders!  :-[

Malachi  beers

Crystaliz

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #580 on: May 31, 2015, 12:54:08 AM »
Definately...getting to waders is fun enough...getting out is like being attacked by a big green leech that wants to eat your ankles... So now I've gone one size bigger so neoprene is more spacious but feet now get lost in giant boots.   Probably where the yowie legend came from....

Jamo

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #581 on: May 31, 2015, 08:09:51 AM »
I reckon the aerobic workout begins when you know the leech dropped inside your waders... scary!
Baaa humbug, not enough fossicking time!

Crystaliz

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #582 on: May 31, 2015, 02:05:53 PM »
Leeeeeeeches are sneaky.

MakkyBrown

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #583 on: May 31, 2015, 03:31:05 PM »
Leeeeeeeches are sneaky.
lol very sneaky, the little black ones down here can burrow through socks, must be like burrowing into an animals fur :(

Crystaliz

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Re: Joke of the Day
« Reply #584 on: May 31, 2015, 07:03:50 PM »
They get their friends to pull the threads apart and in they go....the fat ones have to wait outside your socks.

 

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