Joke of the Day

[pc bowe]

Knock,Knock.
Hodor!

[MrSydney]

We'll see how many get that one! 

[Bucket]

Good timing for that one!

[pc bowe]

Inspired by Da Vinci's birthday, I've been inventernating in the shed for the last 2 weeks, and I've have come up with the "Electric Push Bike".
( HOW GREEN AM I.)
Already I have a "Racing version." (That has 2 cattle prods.)
Plus.
The "Down hill version."(That has the cattle prod in front of the rider.)

[Ghost]

As always, picture required.

[pc bowe]

Just finished a game of Boomerang Golf.
Or Golf Boomerang.
Or what ever it's called when you throw a putter into the bush.

[Ghost]

If you don't pay your excorcist
do you get repossessed?

[pc bowe]

Just finished reading the State Governments proposal to legalise marijuana in Queensland.
Apparently the revenue raised through taxing the weed, will go towards fixing the roads.
They plan to call it operation Pothole.

[pc bowe]

Today.One of the young blokes at work sent me and apparently everyone else in his contacts list what can only be described as an "Accidental Dic Pic".
When I asked him what happened?
He was super embarrassed and told me he hoped it didn't go viral.
I told him not to worry and just to get some ointment from the chemist.

[starsapphire78]

LOL  all very funny

[pc bowe]

It was bloody cold up here the other night.
I woke up freezing and in the dark. I put on a beany and pair of socks.
Two hours later I awoke with a shocking headache.

[pc bowe]

Arriving late at the neighbours house for a footy finals party.
I got there just as desserts were being served, so I offered to take out a dish for the host, ten steps later I tripped on the door jam and face planted into the tray right in front of everyone.
Which produced plenty of laughter.
Not that I heard an of that, because at the time I was a trifle deaf.

[pc bowe]

Aussie Kiss.
Same as French Kiss.
Just Down Under.

[pc bowe]

I learnt two things today.

• At one time my man bits were in the Guinness Book of World Records.
• I am no longer welcome at the Library.

[Ghost]

The Council of a Irish town had just bought a new fire engine and didn't know what to do with the old one, until Paddy spoke up and said,   "I know, we'll keep the old one and use it for false alarms!"


Merry Christmas and a Rocky new year to you all.
I hope the fires in all your areas are all out soon.


Ghost.